Wanted: Engineer Who Jams the Fizz in Your Buzz

Originally Published
March 23, 2016
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Mylestoned is looking for a full-stack engineer who can deliver on our 50-year plan.

  • Aged 13-95.  Male, female or ocelot.  
  • Puts Butt Paste on ears to reduce headphone chaff from incessant coding.
  • Realizes that the only non-reusable design patterns should be in the kitchen.
  • Wants the sales team to cram ‘what-they-just-sold-that-we-don’t-have’ up their asses.
  • Has quietly figured out a compression time-bending formula that provides 67.6 minutes for every daytime hour.
  • Is often referred to as absurd, insane, paradoxical and brave.  Terrifies and confuses most normal humans...
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